Fickle Men!

Sorry it's been a while since the last update, there has been a lot going on in my little world!

Redundancy is hard work, job hunting, partying and generally enjoying myself!

Not been up to much on the dating front, lots of e-mails and texts but no real dates.

I did have a bit of an awkward one on Sunday though, I went to Oulton Park to see the British Super Bikes with the Space Cadet, the only thing was Squaddie was also going, so really it was mad not to try and meet up when we were both in the same place at the same time.

Now as you well know the Space Cadet and I are just friends these days (still a sore point if I'm being honest!) so I said that yes I would meet up with Squaddie to say Hello, I explained to the Space Cadet that a friend was trying to fix us up and that it would be good to meet him to save wasting a date if we didn't like eachother, he spent the day trying to steer me away from the area that Squaddie was in until I decided enough was enough and said I wanted to go and meet him.

Squaddie came and found us and he's ok, ok looking, actually speaks (a nice change sometimes!) we spent about an hour and a half with him which I have to say was awkward, Space Cadet was quiet to say the least!

I don't get it with him, he doesn't want me, I'm just not sure he wants anyone else to either!

Anyway, he came back for tea and it took ages for him to go home (I had an early start for an interview the next morning and was knackered!)

I had a text from Squaddie, saying he'dbeen pleasantly surprised by me and that I was nicer and younger looking than in my photo's and said about taking me on a date, which surprised me as I'd been soaked through to the skin at Oulton, hair a mess, three layers and a waterproof, to be honest I don't know why anyone would want to date me!

I also had a text from the Space Cadet asking if I would like some chill time together in the week (did he get the idea?!)

Anyway, lots of texting with both guys, Squaddie asked me out again but was due to go on a date so I said I thought we should wait until after, however the date didn't happen so he went out on the town with the boys and he met someone, so the date won't be happening now, after all that and awkward Sunday, why are men so fickle? They drive me nuts! He's been asking me out for ages (but would I be so interested if he was still chasing? What is my problem?!)

The Space Cadet text on Tuesday asking me if I was free on Thurs or Fri and I said I was on Thurs so I'm supposed to be going over tomorrow night for tea (cups of) and a DVD, I really think I need to be removing myself from the situation but I'm finding it really hard, I do without a doubt really like him, however I think if I were to go out with him I'd find him a total bore, he does nothing much apart from play Cricket, watch sport on TV and work in a fairly low paid job, is that really what I want to get into again?

I'm really pissed off at myself today, I wish I'd not dragged him over so I could meet him on Sunday and I wish I didn't always choose the wrong men!